It was almost a year ago that the Colorado Avalanche were putting the finishing touches on a very tumultuous offseason. Patrick Roy was gone, but the Avs went out and found what looked like a fantastic replacement in Jared Bednar. And after the team went undefeated in the preseason, I was cautiously optimistic that the Avs might surprise the pundits, maybe even vie for a playoff spot.
Obviously things didn’t turn out that way.
There’s no point in me rehashing what was the worst season by any NHL team since the salary cap (you know, that thing that’s supposed to help teams avoid such things) was established over a decade ago, nor is there much point in telling you they did it with a nearly capped-out roster, nor is there much point in telling you they could have won ten more games and still been in last–
Okay, sorry. I get carried away sometimes.
I really honestly thought my many years of being a fan of Denver sports would have prepared me for it. The slew of Super Bowl losses by the Broncos, the seemingly endless futility of the Nuggets, and pretty much every year the Rockies have existed save for the 2007 World Series run. I’m not even mentioning the years of failure by the Avalanche themselves.
But no, nothing prepared me for watching my favorite team in my favorite sport fail in such a way that seemed to redefine the very word. Witnessing such a complete and total collapse really sort of broke me as a fan, a sensation I’ve not really experienced. Sure, as a fan I whine and complain all the time, question the lineage of every player on the team when things get rough, and sometimes even threaten to take my ball and go home, but I’ve never truly walked away.
I think the thing I resent most about the Avalanche’s season-long faceplant is that I grew so disillusioned I turned hockey off entirely, and in doing so missed out on a lot of great hockey being played by other teams. I missed out on the stellar rookie campaigns of Matthews and Marner in Toronto and Laine in Winnipeg, did little more than read about the exploits of that McDavid kid in Edmonton, and didn’t watch more than scant highlights as the Nashville Predators made their way to the Stanley Cup Finals. I was even that one jerk in fantasy hockey who just up and abandoned his post. In fact, I did that in two leagues. And one of them was a pay league.
But this post is not me attempting to garner sympathy because my favorite hockey team sucks, but rather my attempt at a “soft” breakup with them. I’m still following the Avs, will still root for them, and might even grab a couple tickets next time I’m in town, but I want to be a hockey fan first, an Avs fan second (maybe even third, or fourth, depending on whether or not they effectively end their season in December again). No longer am I going to ignore hockey because my “home” team signed a Swedish albatross as their 2nd/3rd line center, nor will I sit and watch as they continue to play out some sordid, increasingly embarrassing drama with a young player once considered untradeable. And as I type this amidst the dulcet sounds of The Cult’s “Love Removal Machine” around 2:00 in the morning CDT, they still have yet to announce a rumored re-signing of one of their best young defensemen. It just feels like one long, endless holding pattern by an organization that’s grown too indecisive to do anything more than hope one big trade or one emerging player will fix everything.
Enough is enough. I think there’s one of those silly memes with motivational sayings done in flowery text you see posted all over Facebook that reads something like “Don’t let bad people drag you down.” I don’t normally follow such nuggets of wisdom (mainly because I’m usually one of the people doing the dragging) but I think it applies here, except it’s specifically 21 uniformed men and the suits who put them out there I refuse to let this team ruin my hockey experience.
Believe it or not, I am actually somewhat optimistic that the Avalanche will indeed be a better team in 2017-18. Of course, it would be very difficult for them to be any worse, but they do appear to be getting younger, faster, and more skilled. Regardless, even if they somehow scale the mountain back to relevance and even become contenders again in due time, I’m keeping my options open. Call me commitment-phobic but engaging in casual hockey consumption is more fun than lashing my fortunes to a ship going nowhere at the moment.
Crash and burn if you must, Colorado Avalanche. But you ain’t takin’ me with you this time. I will watch the exploits of Nikita Kucherov and the Lightning, Auston Matthews and the Maple Leafs, Connor McDavid and the Oilers…hell, I’ll even watch the Minnesota Wylde if they offer something more palatable than anything the Avs are serving up.
These are the terms, Avs…take ’em or leave ’em.
Or maybe just dangle the rights to my fandom in hopes another team will trade you some of their fans. That’ll fix it, right?
Peace out, Avs…and good luck this upcoming season. You’re gonna need it.
On a side note, it appears the carcass of the 2016-17 season wasn’t the only one Avalanche ownership wanted to display to a wide audience…
ARMORED HEADSPACE 
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